Such a Brief Picking of 'Nuts'

You saw the crimson in the sky and thought of me... Now I will wipe away tears at any sight of the colour crimson, or a sun setting scene somewhere, anywhere, or just a static bleeding horizon in real life or pictures. Were the raven-crows flying away from it, or into it? This shall remain a mystery, as shall knowing whether black was actually succour or just a swift and sudden unexpected cloak of painful gloom.

Tawakkul

When Thank You Is Not Enough...

*I’ve blurred out our names in the picture, for we both know who we are J

I live in Saudi Arabia.

I deeply admire her words; her writing, her talks – I always made fervent attempts to ensure that I didn't miss any webinar or a radio talk that was being held somewhere in the world, which I could only be a part of through the internet. I keep her words in my ipod, to help raise my spirits every time they go on a downward spiral – in order to help me sleep. When she came out with her book, one of my most earnest wishes was to one day be able to read it and own it. But, she lived in the United States of America, and her book was selling only in some parts of the world – mine not being one of them.

We plan, and Allah too Plans, and He (swt) is the Best of Planners…

One of my oldest friend’s, who lives all the way in Birmingham, bought me a copy when she bought one for herself. This was sometime in September 2012. Because of unreliable posts in my parts of the world, the book remained in Birmingham – until my friend decided to send it to me through my sister who had just joined University in the UK in October 2012, and happened to be returning for the holidays so soon because of some official documentations that required her presence back in Saudi Arabia. Somewhere in between the book being bought and my sister returning, this inspirational lady planned a visit to Birmingham – not too far away from my friends’ residence that too – where said friend got to meet her – AND – get my book signed by her, thereby not just sending me a book I so dearly wished to own and read, but also getting it signed by the admired author herself!

SubhaanAllah!

And so, I cannot put into words a thanks that would suffice – to my friend for her beautiful heart, and for such beautiful gestures that remind you of Allah, Who (swt) plans beyond your imagination. It’s people, like my friend, who make cliches come true – for friends and sisters like so are indeed stars that shine in our lives; Alhumdulillah.

And so I say, we plan [must buy book – must read book].

And Allah too Plans [He (swt) gets me the book]

And He (swt) is the Best of Planners [Friend in Birmingham buys book – Sr. Yasmin Mogahed, who lives in America, plans a trip to Birmingham close to friends’ house – Friend gets book signed by her in Birmingham, and sends it to me in Saudi Arabia]

SubhaanAllah!!!

Asleep?

All around me rests; as it sleeps in the quite of the night, I sit outside under a very still pink sky... Everything around me underlines the silence of the night... Everything seems to be at a contrasting parallel to what I have allowed myself to be watching from the 'safety' of my home, these past couple of screaming loud relentlessly moving, yet un-moving hours... This pink night sky is as if a reflection of all the blood that is being shed in the crimes against humanity... The silence itself as if mourning all the loss... A silence before a storm from the Lord of all mankind, perhaps? The soul yearns and hopes, for His commanding stroke to manifest Itself and spread It's desperately called out for Mercy, upon all those pining with their arms outstretched to the skies, with their bodies and families, their unborn fetuses and children, forsaken in the hope of a salvation from their Maker -

Ya Lateef, Ya Hakeem, Ya Qawiyy, Ya Rahman, Ya Raheem, Ya Malik, Ya Jabbar, Ya Furqan, Al Awwal, Al Akhir, Al Qayyum, Al Qareeb...

... I wonder if my pink sky will soon join me, as my eyes cry for the people of Palestine, for the oppressed and needy everywhere... As we - all of humanity under the same sky - bleed under oppression, unhelped, unheard... To death, number after number, multiplying into a nameless heartless statistic quoted to me sometime tomorrow, when the rested have awaken from their quite sleeps...
Allahu musta'an

''Innalillahi wainnailaihi rajioon''

Just Like That...

Safia

She walks in beauty; in sheer elegance, whispered poignance,

In utter command, her emotions in check,

The smile on her face, her glistening eyes;

surely they hold back so much more than a heart can imagine,

those lips that upwards turn, sporting mirth;

surely they hold back dialogue 

that perhaps the heart solemnly withholds,

She truly inspires with her reminiscent attire;

that bun, that beautiful simple chain, and ever so light make up,

it show cased her beauty - inside out,

her very gesture as she showed up to attend

and share in the happiness of her hosts, 

despite her own immense riveting loss -

Oh so much strength! Oh so perfectly cultured! (masha'Allah)

Surely they must be proud while they rest before the Yawn Al Qiyamah? (insha'Allah)

For they have indeed raised a beautiful daughter! (masha'Allah)

May Allah swt bless her with the best of emaan and health

as she takes care of her family; her siblings, her all...

May they all live the best that this duniya has to offer,

and get the ultimate best in the Hereafter too...

~ Ameen. 

*Safia \s(a)-

fia\ as a girl's name is a variant of Safiyah (Arabic, Hindi, Swahili), and the meaning of Safia is "friend; pure".

Gone And Remained

They came and
lingered amidst the fray

Only, so soon to be departed.
The heart and mind
are still recovering from this blow.
May their tests ahead by
made easy and smooth,
and their children
in the wake of this nightmare
have grace beyond imaginable,
cocooned by an abundance

of mercy from The Infinite;
To help them get back up on their feet,
be embalmed in Sabr
and walk with the strength
of Him by their side
through all and everything that lies ahead...

insha'Allah,
~Ameen, Ya Rabb Alameen~

‘O Allah, forgive our living and our dead, those present and those absent, our young and our old, our males and our females.  O Allah, whom amongst us You keep alive, then let such a life be upon Islam, and whom amongst us You take unto Yourself, then let such a death be upon faith.  O Allah, do not deprive us of his reward and do not let us stray after him.’ (*149)

‘Verily to Allah, belongs what He took and to Him belongs what He gave, and everything with Him has an appointed time...' (*154)

‘May Allah magnify your reward, make better your solace and forgive your deceased.’ (*154)

You, Whom I Used To Know...

What is the meaning of this, ''Here today... Gone tomorrow...''

Why are you set on repeat? Teaching a new story each time,

Lessons replete; some unpalatable, some in retrospect meant to be a treat,

What is the meaning of this, ''A part of me, you - yet later - no more?''

Why are you transient; with your lessons of stubborn impermanence!

Oh, the new you's, the old few's - the heart, perplexedly, doth wonder...

* Dedicated to friendships... The song, 'cos the chorus sat well with the sentiment - the rest, enjoyable nevertheless too :D

My Every Other Sisters' Paradise

Cold Play: Paradise (lyrics)

(The verses below have been instantly inspired by the song above, and dedicated to all the sisters out there...)

Their dreams left on hold; immortalised 

My every other sister 

Living this life; part paralysed... 

As a child, seeing with eyes opened wide 

My every other sister 

Looking at life now; partly desensitised... 

Walking around with hopes to one day sour out; fly high 

My every other sister 

Gets back up; by yet another fall, temporarily mortified... 

Listening, doing; all as she is expected to do 

My every other sister 

Existing for their sake; has been skillfully mollified... 

Making the best of today; her gift of life 

My every other sister 

In her sleep goes to take a much needed bite of paradise...

Mustafa

placebo running up that hill mp3 | lyrics

free music downloads | music videos | pictures

A little mite, you.

You came, and before I knew it, now you are gone.

A little mite, you. I knew you not, but felt your existence through someone I did. I saw you not, only heard about you being born... for not too long though. Today, less than 4 months later, you are now gone. Hearing of your pain has left me in a pain different- nevertheless, deep. Torn and bereft are those who made you (albeit with His, our Lord's permission), held you, played with you, nursed you and reveled in your being.

In your Maker are they all seeking solace now; left confused and trying hard to find peace in the knowledge that He, your Maker Knows Best. May your family find the sabr with you being gone... May the last memories of your pain be removed from all the heavy hearts that with it's memory breathe, morosely burdened... May your abode in heaven be a source of blessing in their lives... May those who remain with your memories, remember all that was in your presence good, and find constant peace in your memory, dear Mustafa... insha'Allah; Ameen.

Baby Rayyan

If there is a living delight; that's you - squealing, screeching, babbling to the core.
If there is a bottle of jam, sealed with goodies within; that's you, my mumbling mumbo to the jumbo little Winnie the Pooh.
If there is a smile, that my heart holds on to oh so tight; that's you, teary eyed me can't have enough of you.
If there is a hand that holds my little pinky with sheer might; that's you, my dear little super man, in your rompers day and night.
If there is a boy who is goodness in real life; that's you, baby Rayyan - hidden secrets of joy you give life to, with your every breath!

Bless your soul, mash'Allah!


May we forever maintain this string of connection unto eternity, insha'Allah; Ameen!

Mistaken Love?

to kia hua bilal khan coke studio mp3 | lyrics

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Broken hearts across the globe
Come together in melancholic melody
For some rhyme or reason
To share their tragedies of
That same someone who
Was meant to be with another,
Stories of that same someone who
Was just a transient fantasy
 And a real life misnomer...

Falling In Love... Again?

faith hill fireflies mp3 | lyrics

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Little did I know, I was falling in love again...

He was a darling innocent charmer, with smiling piercing eyes, and the adorablestest of chuckles. Go on... scoff at my usage of word's that are not in the English dictionary [yet? 0=) ], but when one is speaking of love... alas, a shortage of words to describe it is a given. And so, with that little 'misdemeanour' spoken for, I must go on to eulogise this emotion that has overtaken my little moments, every day, since these past 4 months and counting. I find the joys in murmuring sweet nothings, cherishing shared smiles, and cooing absolute nonsense, all shared through incessant cuddles that seem never enough. When that innocent mouth puckers up to gurgle or giggle, my heart gets wrapped around his little finger avowing eternal love! Who'd have known my little nephew would remind me of what love felt like again, albeit of a whole another kind!

I love you, my little GooGoo... *signed, Phuppo.

Sabra and Shatila

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZjU_Sj8_5KE

The last sips of my chai I took, when I clicked upon the above link to unveil to my eyes, rather my ears - that which I did not wish to see. How does one see with their ears? One see's when the words heard tell of a story real. Pictures take shape in your mind's eyes, and an image crushed comes back to life. Blood becomes real, their cries become loud, their voices can be heard and so much imagined, remains no more - imagined that is.

Many a times I have been there, as have you. So many times I have refused to allow my eyes and ears from living their screams and realities. So many times I have succeeded, but every time that I have not, is when I have perhaps done something right. To what avail is hiding, blocking one's self from pain that was really another's? What does this hiding achieve? If only our hearts were to open and see the pains that exist in a world very much the same as we live in, but oh so different in the lives we live. While I was growing up in a house - fed, loved and safe, they were being cheated of life itself before it even began. While I was being looked upon by eyes of parents that were disciplining my wrongs, and loving my achievements - they were being washed by theirs and buried... or not, for their parents too were gone? How do two such extreme lives continue to exist in a world that in name is the same, but the lives permitted to them both have no one standing up to take the blame? How do we convince ourselves to stop listening, watching - while those who lose, continue without having a choice or the means? How does one find the peace and sleep, when the images are not even real for me and yet this is how they leave me to feel? How does one pray to their Lord, and beg for His mercy to spread over His creations? What a test, their life truly is. In knowing that those gone, have done so straight up to His Promised Heaven, but the plight left behind through their blood, is only watering the bed for more lives to be lost in their name - no matter what side of the game they be shed on. For how long shall this be, for how long shall all this so remain?

With a piercing headache, I only manage to type out my angst... and listen to some more pictures that I shall for now, leave unframed.

Somalia; In Allahá Maá Saábireen!

For every sip we take and every bite we eat, For every moment of peace we sleep and every commodity we buy unnecessarily - May we watch and weep, for how can we not be heavily moved by all the blessings that surround us from so afar unto so very deep, in every moment and in our every heart beat!

Alhumdulillah-e-Rabbul-Al-Ameen!
Alhumdulillah-e-Rabbul-Al-Ameen!
Alhumdulillah-e-Rabbul-Al-Ameen!

Off She Goes to Grow Up (iA)

Your time has come, and I feel like I am in some ways still not ready - Alas, it has been a long wait, so brush my feelings aside I do under a guise of busyness that shall keep a check on these wily emotions of mine.

So much going on; to add to which we have an abundance of unnecessary chaos - of emotions, words, feelings, and things of material insignificance. Your face expresses what your tongue holds back; I know, because I have pretty much raised you alongside my ma and na. The last 18 years have been spent ignoring your disrespect, accepting your differences, laughing at your wise cracks, adoring your little overtures, and loving you despite all that I may disagree with; all encompassing of everything that makes you - you. You are a little part of me, as is your disgruntled but oh so sensible other older sib-sis, and I love you both in ways that go beyond words and actions. Little meaning my words may have for either of you at most times, but in this insignificant chamber of mine I crawl into nevertheless, to leave my emotionally laden thoughts for safe keeping.

Off go you to those shores afar that we have steadily for months fought tirelessly for, in aspirations of your better tomorrows. May your journey to these unknown lands be forever in the Shade of His Pristine Mercy, your companions be righteous and honest, your heart be strong and confident, your actions resolute and unshaken - May you be surrounded by His Blessings Kind, and around yourself always find Him Sublime - keeping you Safe and under His Light - AMEEN!

I look forward to seeing you return - knowing full well that there remain 24 hours still yet until you depart - a happier, stronger and wiser Nummers! My duas along with a tiny piece of me, go with you. Take care my youngest little star - B'dee loves you...

~ FiamaanAllah.

To Sarrinah

From her ribbons to her nose,
From her mommy's eyes,
To her little toes,
May the little flower forever be blessed,
May she forever bloom and impress,
Surrounded by everyone's love utterly immense,
Smiles from sunrise reaching up to unknown skies,
May little Ms. Sarrinah, be a source of joy and light,
To all that she has been blessed with,
As our little present from Allah, The All Might!
Ameen...
Ameen...
Ameen...

And I write this little ode to our darling,
With misty eyes, and longing arms... that hope to hold her soon, iA!
♥ and x's... to Shoobi and Shooba. and of course, our little miss delight (born April 14, 2011, in the night).

Facebook Users

*Picture credits, all individually go to those who made them. I only accumulated them from the web and put them in a collage.
     
*Disclaimer: This is not meant to ridicule Facebook itself, rather just some of it's ''users'' **cough*abusers*cough**

Facebook-ers as I've seen them. Some I love to bits, regardless of their idiosyncrasies. Some... I'd rather not say what I really want to about them. Politeness wins. Nevertheless, my take on them all below:


1) The general social people who are there to keep in touch, the normal acceptable way.

2) The bored social people whose boredom has driven them to stalker standards, nevertheless managing to maintain general harmless behaviour.

3) The busy social people who are closet stalkers and blatant gossipers.

4) The bored unsocial people who are closet stalkers, silent envy-ers, God knows Best whether they are thus harmless or not.

5) The absolutely pretentious jobless narrow minded psuedo-well-meaning advice monger-ers; they read your words off wall posts, statuses, photo albums, comments to others and triple jump to their own conclusions and judgements, dragging in with them a barrage of blind followers.

6) The brain-numbed to the social scene gamers.

7) The finger-happy mindless 'like-ers'.

8) The attention-craving, at the speed of light status changers, who should be elsewhere twittering with their own kinds.

9) The absolutely confused newbies and equally confused old-bies who comment randomly on off-the-subject discuss worthy threads/statuses/pictures/posts.

10) The super cautious mind bogglingly terrified of where my information may go from here no picture false information empty profile thread bare friend list kind of users.

11) The perv kings and queens who want to jiggy with it via inbox... ''dear pls frand me you are beautiful my number is 14M57U91D [if you're visual you can read that as it was meant to be said] 0= )

12) The random friend request senders because you have mutual friends. Yes, we said Hi to each other once. Err... really? No, I knew your mom... Err... okay, so? Yes I saw you at the mall... Err... creep alert!

13) The genuine event, but random organisers who invite you to an event knowing you live across the globe and the event is today or tomorrow.

14) The god awful group inbox reply-ers who cannot see the difference between the ''reply to all'' and ''reply'' under the senders name buttons O_O

15) The picture stalkers who like your picture before you are done editing the caption on it after posting.

16) The friend list stalkers who soon after making friends eat your friend list with their eyes to instant friend request someone from your list to increase their number of **cough*friends*cough**. These are pretty similar to # 12 above.

17) The I know you well enough to make personal comments, ignorants. This lot should ASAP be deleted from your list. Those who are too polite to do so must suffer the consequences O_O

18) The one's who can't type lYk aDuLts or who hv 2 spk in wys tht r sre 2 bst a vA9 in ur i. This is not your mobile phone that charges you for every letter, nor are we in a hurry to communicate letters per second. Please type in full, else I won't read it. Thanks O_O

19) The ''lolz'' droppers at the end of a serious comment/compliment. It's like they're actually saying, '' ha ha ha in your face, FOO!'' =S

20) The one's who love to tag you in every ugly god forsaken picture.

21) The one's who read anything and everything you say, and think it's about them...

... 
... 

... So, which one are you?  0= )

Asunder

She needs to walk out of the door. Not look back or try to compromise with her thoughts. Where they lie in their present state becomes apparent when she hears that in her sleep she cried and tried to beg for something that only made her cry some more. What could be plaguing her mind; perhaps a deeply rooted, recently molested rudely awoken state of duress? The pains she imagines, and consistently gets told that she does nothing but imagine them, live inside her body - surely they exist. Perhaps time in its mystical way will unfold what is to be. It will unfold what is to be! Perhaps is just my denial. It stems from the untapped fear of it all being too late, by the time reality comes to terms with it all. Maybe's and What-if's together comprise the main ingredient that concocts and brews this dilemma into a froth of mayhem inside her fabric of being leaving it thoroughly wrought, plundered; asunder.

Rolling In The Deep

Adele: Rolling in the deep


Exactly how it feels... for the person I knew when I knew you.
But... the person that now exists because of you, I fail to understand.
The memory of her comes alive when it knows the words to this song.
The body of her quietens it.
The soul of her, prays for you and her... and her.

~ FiamaanAllah