Distrubed Limbo

The cursor on the screen blinks at me while I, in my resigned silence, stare back at it – for how long I know not. The noise, the chaos, the upheaval, the utter disturbance of it all has seeped into my very existence as I painstakingly try to breathe through the insect repellent, cement dust, and chips of wood that have been abandoned and left to waft around at their wily leisure. With a mechanical sweep of the hand I kill a buzzing stray mosquito number infinite, about to mark its territory; with a whack of a kitchen tissue roll, housefly that was waiting by in planned silence to attack by daylight meets its abrupt demise. These 'bugger bys' seem to exist in platoons un-defeatable!

The astounding profundity of getting by another day looms at me. The joke of our everyday existence based on utilities, ergo technology, mocks at me. The tick in the background warns me of precious minutes waning off quicker than fathomable; the beep of a repetitive sound numbingly snickers in seemingly glee at its accomplishment of not letting me find peace in that which really needed to be done. My sight glazes up, my tightly coiled emotions further coil up -alarmingly so- into twisted twists unappeasable! Disdain for all -et all- reeks through my very everything. Why can't all just settle down and let the dust of me breathe? In this wretched not knowing I mask myself and end my sleep weary musings thus…

''Tomorrow, please be kind to me?''

At the shaken end of an unplanned sneeze, I gawk unattached at a confused bit of lint flutter by, akin to my deranged sense of uppity all; inexplicably appalled.

Alziemers:: Away From Yourself?

To not know yourself... to be unable to recognize the very one's who've always been there by your side... to be marooned inside a cavity no more familiar to yourself... to be unable to remember the most basic, but remember the most trivial, to be unable to remember the most poignant, yet remember the most random... to be lost in a space devoid of any voice... to be lost in a trance absent of images... to be alive and live by the side of such? to be alive yet agonizing with a life like such? to be helpless, helpless, helpless... to be helpless, helpless, helpless...




k. d. lang: Helpless, performed for the Movie, Away From Her. [Written by Neil Young]

	k.d. lang - Helpless PL t?umaczenie