Friday 24 December 2010

Unsettled by 'My Own Self'

The sound of babies crying and children throwing tantrums (albeit the kinds unabated); leads to something at my core to tangle up into a major distress of sorts in the form of an untappable rage, controlled by a mere shred of I know not what, desperately trying not to snap or erupt. In that moment I feel like either a vein in my head will burst, or something else in front of my eyes right then and there should, in order to stop the sounds that my ears don't seem to be able to withstand.

A near second to this anomaly, is the sound of a quarrel between family members and their likes. This one is less volatile, more piercing to the heart, where in the heart feels like it will burst if their discord won't assuage sometime soon.

I didn't use to react like so.
What changed?

Unsettled being, I have been left to remain at times like such, not knowing my own self.

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