Saturday, 26 September 2009

To tolerate...

Sometimes I simply tolerate people because I don’t want to hurt them.
I guess it is better to tolerate than to be rude and hurt right?

I just hope my tolerating abilities don’t run out too soon…

I wonder if tolerance is a virtue or am I deluding myself of being kind when I ''tolerate'' another human being?

I still feel it is better than hurting the other person by being blatantly rude.

But if the person finds out that ‘he/she’ were being tolerated, then the hurt goes even deeper, no?

So what does one do then? o_O

Be rude and hurt? Or tolerate to be kind?


salim said...

I like your thoughts on tolerance and kindness and that you are grappling with it. It goes further towards something I read on a facebook page once: This person liked a "gentle view of the world."

Tolerance, patience....these virtues, I think are packed into a larger virtue, which is forgiveness. To forgive, you need many things--tolerance, patience, kindness and most of all a giving nature. You can think of telerance as a kind of giving at first. Then it turns into normalcy....i.e. you are accepting of others differences. However differences that don't cause emotional, spiritual or physical distress is one thing--but when they hurt, then it is time to act in a tolerant, respectful way to make your point.

I think there is a way to do so without being rude. I am still learning how. Help me find it!

To me forgiving is more valuable to the forgiver than the forgiven. It is a high road, steep and prone to slippage. But if you do it often enough, you learn the footholds that keep you there. And when those footholds become second nature, you'll reach out and grab people who are struggling as you once did (you still do, but not excruciatingly so) and ease their way into respectdom.

My two halala, two annas or two cents.

salim said...

Can't believe I spelled tolerance wrong! I am going to blame it on Kaash (my cat) who often walks on my keyboard and distracted me hahaha :)

Hayaah said...

I have told u that I love the way u think before, right? :D

I grinned thru out that comment and didnt even notice the mis-spelt(sp?) word :P

Dont worry abt it, for TG aint here ;)

I love the foothold analogy. Love it!