Wednesday, 11 February 2009

The Spinning Cycle of Pain; Why?

Everytime he shouts at 'her', her heart breaks a little. If only he'd start talking more politely. He has better than before, but it's still offending however much it may have toned down. She knows the pain of watching them go at each other from the other end of the door or even two rooms away sometimes - Always unable to fix them - Will they ever set their differences aside and try to be appreciative of each other?

Then she hears of 'his' differences from the get go. When she hears of their discord, her heart aches for them both. She listens to 'him' tell her about how they must stay together because of their child, and she feels intense searing pain for that child, who may not see ''her'' parents scream and shout like she has seen hers. Nevertheless, she knows the truth of what ''she'' may feel like when ''she'' realises that they dont love each other. Will she ever hear about them being happy, about doing things together and speaking of -her- in a positive way?

She can't be a part of it. Not when she knows the pain of one family. She may help him feel better about himself, but she cannot be someone who would let herself become part of that discord. They have to want to make things better between them.

Each of ''them'' must...

People get into relationships as husband and wife, boyfriend and girlfriend, give it whatever name one must. What is it that reels them into wanting another to call their own? What is their inspiration? More importantly, what is their drive and motivation in keeping it going, come what may, through thick and thin? Do promises hold any ground any more? What changes so drastically, that the intial bond that brought them together, gets snapped? Why can't people work on it as much harder as they need to? Why are we all so selfish? What is this need, that drives one away from another in search of some other, or that something that they feel is missing? Why not build what is missing in your present with the one that you do have? Why does the person you chose initially become someone you don't want anymore? Why are we so fickle, so greedy, so undecisive, so self obsessed, so selfish? Saying that we did not choose the person is not an excuse. If we have been matured enough to not say 'no' when the time was right, then it has been us who got into that position. So how about making the most of that now? Are we immature children who whine about the candy that they were denied? Are we? I thought growing up was about beating the odds, working around problems, solving issues, and realising what is unfixable and moving on...

I do not understand the reason of constant pain... self inflicted perhaps, but whether we accept it or not, the other person involved is part of the pain too. They may be feeling their end of it, but no one is painless, no matter how they appear to us.

Pain depresses me... mine, of those arnd me and of those I know and cannot necessarily reach out to...

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